On Becoming Fearless...in Love, Work, and Life by Arianna Huffington

Author:Arianna Huffington [HUFFINGTON, ARIANNA]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: SEL021000
ISBN: 9780759568273
Publisher: Little, Brown and Company
Published: 2006-09-03T16:00:00+00:00

Melina Kanakaredes is currently starring in CSI: NY.

Fearless About Money

The Key to Abundance

WOMEN, MONEY, AND work—talk about a triangulated relationship. Money is, of course, inextricably tied up with work. It's what we get in return for our labor, it's how we pay our bills, it's what we devote an enormous share of our lives to making. And, yes, that's true for both men and women. But for women there's an added twist: How do we earn what we're worth in a world that still pays us seventy-eight cents to a man's earned dollar? The answer: fearlessness.

But it's hard to be fearless about something that is so elemental—so wrapped up with survival. And even if we have an adequate income, "poverty consciousness"—the fear that no matter how much we have, it's never enough—can fill us with gut-gripping terror. Some of the richest women I know are still driven by the fear of ending up as bag ladies.

Sometimes poverty consciousness becomes a motivator. Mellody Hobson is a remarkable success story: At thirty-seven, she's one of the wealthiest and most influential African American women in the country. "I'll always be thankful for what I've been given," she told me. But a tumultuous, financially unstable home life as a child instilled in her the fear of being penniless, a fear that's been both a positive motivator and a source of constant anxiety.

"I had no sense of security," she says, "and was always worried about money even as a small child. So I resolved that I would never have to struggle. I even made a vow to myself: 'I am going to be rich! I can't live like that.' " Money for Mellody represented freedom—and choices. But even now she wonders, "What if I screw up and lose everything? What is the amount of money that would make me comfortable? And my number is always much higher than my friends'." When she could, she'd even pay her phone bill and mortgage for an entire year. "So if everything goes wrong, I'd at least have a phone and a place to live." Money fears can be so strong, and sometimes irrational, that even Mellody, with all her financial success, can't completely banish hers.

We pursue wealth with the hope that it can vanquish fear, but sometimes the relentless acquisition of money is simply a manifestation of other fears. "Money is very powerful," says Maria Young, a financial educator at Rutgers University, "and people have emotional needs that they try to satisfy with money."

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